Speaking up; speaking your truth; and saying what you need, want and desire are areas that so many people, especially women, have trouble with.
Speaking your truth is also tied directly to holding strong boundaries. They go hand-in-hand.
And for the women, they also go hand-in-hand with the womb.
If there’s a lot of womb trauma (just being a woman in the patriarchal society), the womb will have some walls up, and these two areas: speaking your truth and boundaries will be challenging.
Do you often say nothing when something triggers you? Maybe you think that your needs don’t matter, and people-pleasing takes over so that people will like you or so they don’t think you’re high maintenance.
When you do this, you aren’t in integrity with yourself. So this is an invitation to start letting that go and know that your needs, wants and desires matter just as much as the other people’s.
Where to start?
Start with the little things. For example, if somebody has borrowed something and not returned it within a reasonable amount of time, speak up and ask for it back.
If you’re with a small group of friends and you are asked where you’d like to go eat, speak up and name your favorite place. Forget about saying, ‘I don’t mind. I’ll go where everybody wants to go.’…. unless that is your truth.
Start practicing with the small, low-stakes stuff where you feel a little uncomfortable speaking your truth, but you can do it. As you practice, you get better and more confident with it all.
This will help you when you have a more escalated situation with high stakes. You will have had all that practice and feel way more confident to speak your truth and hold strong boundaries.
Your voice matters! You matter!
Sending many blessings,
Helen